no sleep ever

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chloe is going to be 17 months old in a couple of days and i have lost hope that she will start sleeping through the night. noah slept through his frst time at 17 months (chloe was born approx. a month later) and i’ve held out that chloe would do the same. yeah not happening.
basically, i’ve slept unawakened a handful of times in about the last 3 years. the thought almost makes me panic. it’s so strange to think about that and about how it is my life and i accept it. don’t get me wrong. i would love to hit the pillow and stay there in dreamland for the next 8 hours. 6 hours. 3 or 4.
but i don’t and it’s crazy and i’ve learned to be okay.